Stereotypes are Dangerous

I have been increasingly irritated by the rampant stereotypical assumptions happening all around.

I looked up the word stereotype. It said " to believe unfairly that all people or things with a particular characteristic are the same" Well, that pretty much says it right there. Unfair. I realize that stereotypes exist for a reason. When a large number of people in any given group exhibit a certain characteristic, it is natural for our brains to make a connection. The problem is when we can't get past it. The problem is when we can't fathom someone in a group not fitting into that box we have observed and even punish them or humiliate them for not fitting. That is when it becomes seriously unfair.

Anyone with an ounce of awareness knows that our country is ablaze with conflicts around this issue.

  Let's look at gender.  That one is close to my heart.  I'm not "normal."  I am female, but I hate pink, flowers, tea parties, dressing up, fashion, etc....  I have spent most of my life feeling like an outcast because I wasn't like "most girls." (Over the years I have realized that most girls don't fall into the stereotype) When baseball was my favorite thing in the world, finding girl friends to share that with was difficult.  They were all into things I had no interest in.  Making friends was difficult for me because I was different.  In recent years, people like me have been labeled as "gay." because they lay outside the stereotype.  I think that is a big problem.  What does your sexuality have to do with whether you like GI Joe or Barbie dolls?  Now we have people so bound up by these gender stereotypes, they are convinced that they were born in the wrong body and are pumping their bodies full of chemicals and having surgery to mutilate their genitals to make their body fit into the stereotype that they believe they fall into.  I am horrified by this.  The stereotype is wrong, not the person.  Who ever said that we all have to look alike?  Who defined what it means to be male or female?  It's a biological fact, the rest is subjective and falls on a large spectrum of characteristics, even the sex related hormones we have fall on a spectrum.  I fall into the guy category in most stereotypical definitions, but I'm a girl.  I just happen to land outside the "typical" part of the spectrum.  I'm ok with that.  I'm not like everyone else and that is just fine.  It took me years to feel comfortable with who I am, and I blame our culture of inflexible stereotypical thought for that.

In the political arena it seems that black people and hispanices are all assumed to be democrats.  When anyone makes a statement that they support the republican candidate, the media attacks them as a traitor to their own people, or a "token" being used by the GOP.  This again is extremely unfair and narrow minded.  It is saying that people are not free to think for themselves, and rather should be lemmings and just follow the crowd, stay in the box of how we have defined you.  Is it fair to shame someone for following their own beliefs?  No. We are a large nation of diverse people.  There is no way that everyone that checks a certain box will believe the same things.  I know I sure don't.  

I'm sure there are tons of examples, racial profiling and all that, but I will stop there. I'm sure we've all experienced the injustice of stereotyping in our own lives at some point.   

When you define boxes to contain people, it can be detrimental to their identity if they become convinced that they are supposed to be a certain way because of the label they bear.  It stifles the freedom to be who they were created to be. Our culture likes to say nice things like "be unique" "be yourself" - but in reality, we all know that they are saying "be the same" "don't color outside the lines" "shame on you for not fitting in."   

 I can't stand all the critics at any celeb event.  They rip people apart for what they choose to wear.  Why is that socially acceptable?  Children learn very young how to "fit in" or they face a life of ridicule and abuse from their peers.  As long as we adults continue to do it on every front, our children will continue to be stifled and stuffed into boxes.

I have had the thought that a big part of why so many people live life feeling unloved is because of this issue.  The extreme pressure to fit in stifles our uniqueness.  When you have to pretend to be something you are not, being liked or loved loses its value.  When people love you for something you know you're not, the love you receive isn't real to you.  I think this is a big factor in the numbers of depressed people around us.  We all long to be loved and known, but as long as we feel the pressure to conform, that love will never be fulfilling when it's based on a lie.  

Our culture is in need of a huge shift.  There are campaigns all over speaking to this problem, but are they working?  What is behind it all?  Are we so scared of someone finding out who we are that we feel the need to put others down?  Can we change?  Can we make a point to train ourselves to view people as individuals instead of lumping them in with whatever category comes to mind at first sight?  Can we allow others the freedom to be unique?  Can we celebrate all people, regardless of where they fall on the spectrum?  I hope so.  I'm trying to be better about this.  The stereotypes do pop into my head still, and while it may be a starting place, I try to allow room for a person to show me who they are outside of that box.

PS - After writing this, I listened to a sermon that I felt fit.  Danny Silk at Jesus Culture church.  He says the Greek word translated "accuser" (the devil) is "categoros"  hmmm.....   Have a listen if you please.

https://jesusculture.com/sacramento/podcast/?listen=the-gift-of-discernment