I could be called all sorts of things for this one, but I am ok with that. I'm tired of hearing the gay rights struggle compared to the race struggles of this country. I don't believe they are parallel issues.
Race is something you are born with and cannot change, and has no moral implications, nor does it cause any damage to yourself or anyone else. Sexuality on the other hand is all about choices and has many ramifications.
Before anyone jumps all over me yelling, "no one chooses to be gay!" let me clarify that that is not the issue either. None of us can choose how we feel about anything, but maturity and responsibility means that we make choices about what to do with our feelings. That's all I'm saying.
I believe in a certain moral code. So do you. We may not agree on what that is, but we do each have one. My moral code says that sex is to be enjoyed solely in the marriage relationship between a husband and wife. I believe that is the only context in which sex can be morally participated in. It is not a basic human need (except in the large scale of society). We can live without it if the appropriate context never arises. While I know that not everyone holds that view, we all do have a belief on this issue. We are all free to choose how we believe and act accordingly.
In any relationship, I think that more often than not, the partners expect the other to be faithful to them. That brings to mind a popular modern idea - 'if I feel like doing it, it's ok to do it.' So what happens if you are attracted to another person while committed to your spouse? It happens. Here is the moment of truth. What do you really believe? What is more important? Your feeling, or your commitment? It all comes down to a choice. Stereotypically, a man is sexually attracted to many women. In today's logic, he should be able to follow those attractions whenever he has them, but we all know that his wife will probably be very upset about that. In general in this society, we expect our spouses to make a moral choice to go against their feelings and stay faithful. Do we believe our feelings are more true than our convictions? Are we swayed easily by emotion until we compromise our core values?
A person can make a choice to be monogamous, polygamous, promiscuous, or celibate. What do you believe, why do you believe that, and how true are you to your own beliefs? Do your beliefs change based on your feelings, or are they grounded on a solid foundation?
We always have a choice, and in the end, we each reap the consequences and benefits of the choices we make. I'd just like to say, count the cost. Make educated decisions. Don't act out on your feelings without adding logical thought to the situation. I've seen so many people go through so much pain because they act in the moment, based on emotions instead of solid core beliefs. I want this message to be an encouragement to people to think through their own process. Consider who you want to be, what you want to stand for, how much lasting pain you want to endure for the sake of temporary pleasure. You are powerful and you can control your feelings and make choices that you won't regret in the morning.
So right on, Jessi. I've seen and experienced so much pain in watching people make wrong choices and then regretting it, though sometimes it takes time for the regrets to set in. We always reap what we sow eventually. It takes more strength and courage to do the right thing even though the temporary feeling seems to take precedence. There is always a reward in faithfulness. In our society today things are backwards to a huge degree. What we see on TV and in movies is what we think is the "right" or "common" thing to do, but we aren't seeing the consequences that would take place in a real situation. What a tragic example we are setting for our young folks. I like your sentence, "Do we believe our feelings are more true than our convictions?" Maybe nowadays convictions have flown out the window.
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